At We Are BRAVE disagreement is our thing. Crazy right..? Well, not when you know how to disagree well and make it your superpower.
In this article I’ll dispel the top 3 myths on disagreement and introduce you to three pillars that can guide you to success. They are Structure, Discipline and Skill.
But first, Why dispel the myths?
You don’t have to; there is always a choice. It could be that your current relationships and the level of discomfort you feel about disagreement means you can maintain a reasonable level of resilience in your work or personal life, but if that’s not working for you, keep reading.
Myth Number 1. It’s better to have difficult conversations ‘in the moment’.
With this myth, we convince ourselves that having a conversation ‘in the moment’ is better and less stressful because it’s over and done with quickly – well, technically it is, but only for you. The problem is, it’s often not a repeatable or helpful conversation and so the stress level continues from conversation to conversation.
We’d suggest replacing this myth with Pillar 1 – Structure. Using this helps you speak up and disagree well in the moment.
Myth Number 2. I can just wing it – I don’t need to prepare, I know what I need to say.
With this myth, we can congratulate ourselves a little on our approach because it can give us a short-term, but potentially false, sense of confidence. We feel brave, we know what we want to say and so away we go…
For this one you need Pillar 2 – Discipline. By learning to develop your own discipline to follow structure, control your EQ and be focused on resolution, not winning.
Myth Number 3. We’ll fall out and it will damage our relationship so I just won’t address it.
With this myth, we can avoid the possible discomfort or upset by replacing the conversation with avoidance. We doacknowledge that this is a good short-term strategy to help you find the right time for a conversation, but as a long-term strategy, it will only increase stress levels.
The final Pillar 3 – Skill. It’s all about utilising your skill and we can teach you exactly how to do that on our training programs.
These pillars are an introduction to our methodology. We use these simple tools to break through the myths around disagreement and increase your individual resilience within those conversations. It can feel empowering to know you can approach harder conversations with simple changes and who knows, maybe even learn to enjoy them!
In summary
In the short term, using these simple pillars to build small, repeatable steps into your routine gives you a strong foundation for braver conversations on topics you may have avoided.
In the long term, shifting your perspective and embracing well-formed disagreement will increase your ability to innovate into the future.
Sara
